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Statement to my headset



#2
My poor earpiece. You and I go way back. All the way to November 2013. You came in the box of my pre-ordered PS4 unit, the very first of its kind. While many laughed at me for holding on to you for as long as I did (*koff koff fuck you Joel koff koff*), I did not let those people change my opinion on you. Little did I know at the time, we would share many memories together. We've raided tombs on the island of Yamatai. We've scored goals in some weird thunderdome where cars hit a football around like we're Champions League players. And most importantly, we've been through everything the darkness has thrown our way. It is in this journey that your untimely death occurred. Against my own morals, I entered a fireteam with a group of friends I have had the pleasure of meeting through one YouTuber's broad and diverse community, to play one of the most bullshit player versus player game modes available, the Iron Banner. The rage was already fueling through me, but it was a match on Widow's Court that made me hit stage seven rage. The redbar and absolute fuckface JAMES_B0NDD thought he was the greatest player to ever step foot in the Crucible, and teabagged me everytime he killed someone. Of course, me being the terrible player that I am, ended up dying to him four times, each adding on to my near max'd out rage level. As his laggy balls were slamming against my Ghost, the earpiece grew more and more vulnerable to my ever growing rage. Then came the fated moment where I, the earpiece's trusted owner, did the unimaginable. After I finally got my revenge on TheRedbar27, JAMES_B0NDD, I died to a teammate of his, causing me to spike my controller with the earpiece still connected to it like Dwight Clark receiving "The Catch" from Joe Montana. Though unlike that moment in football history, the consequence was the loss of one of my greatest companions. The set crashed into the floor, causing the in ear piece to split open and have the copper wire come loose. I brought this upon myself. I entered Iron Banner after pledging ten minutes earlier that I would never do such again, a fault none but my own. A twitter account has been created under the username @NowDead_Headset in memory of the forsaken companion of mine. But more realistically, a personal reminder of my failure as an owner and caretaker. So may you rest well, old friend, for you will never be forgotten. It did not have to end like this, it never does. From the bottom of my heart, I am truly saddened and sorry for my actions. Your sacrifice will never be in vain.


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#3
First off, I'm amazed it lasted 4 months let alone 4 years.

This was way too funny to read lol. Like some dark chapter of a novel from a confessed murderer. Bravo, dear Jon.

And I ain't sorry, GET A REAL HEADSET! lol <3
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#4
(08-05-2017, 07:48 AM)Jhobephoto6678 Wrote: First off, I'm amazed it lasted 4 months let alone 4 years.

This was way too funny to read lol. Like some dark chapter of a novel from a confessed murderer. Bravo, dear Jon.

And I ain't sorry, GET A REAL HEADSET! lol <3

Well I have to now. That thing was amazing, so you better apologize
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#5
I still have mine and still, use it...it so far has served me very well "even if sometimes it ends up in the washing machine".
lmao
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